Be Kind to Your Readers, Even When They’re Wrong
Remember you may be brutally challenging their current reality
So much of writing for change involves addressing people who are wrong. Not just (or even technically) factually wrong, but morally wrong.
People who are backing the wrong leader, endorsing cruelty, and doing to others as they would hate to have done unto them.
There’s no way an objective outsider could successfully argue they’re doing the morally correct thing.
But sometimes - often, even - they think they are.
People have their reality built from the outside in. Certain communities weave a web of false narratives so dense it’s hard to fight through them and make your way out.
So be kind to your readers as you work to help dismantle those narratives. The better your arguments, the kinder you need to be.
Haruki Murakami once wrote:
“Always remember that to argue, and win, is to break down the reality of the person you are arguing against. It is painful to lose your reality, so be kind, even if you are right.”
It’s not easy, but it’s worth trying. The next time your writing is addressing those on the moral low ground, start with kindness. Consider the person brought up with an abhorrent set of beliefs. Taught those, and nothing else.
See their moral compass, not as lacking or even broken, but as deliberately sabotaged by those around them. See if you can have the same compassion you would to anyone brought up in an abusive setting.
You can still make all the points you want to in your writing. You can still signpost what’s right, and compassionate, and fair, and just. But you can start with kindness.
Or as James Clear puts it in one of my favourite essays:
“Be kind first, be right later.”
Some thoughts from others I’ve been enjoying this week
Please Fix Your Substack Welcome Letter from
What People Who Live Down in a Hole Get Wrong About the Misery of Life from
What else I’ve been up to this week
Watching: Jane Austen: Rise of a Genius
Reading: Mansfield Park
Researching: More classic novels to read - or re-read if I haven’t for a decade or more (feel free to send me your recommendations)
This week’s Medium post
No new Medium post this week. Here’s one from the archives. (Friend link, as always, so you can read for free if you’re not a member.)
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